MONOSACCHARIDE: The simple sugar.

When it’s ready, the world will slow down too.

If you’re like me, and you love spending your days dancing alone in your room in front of the mirror, or with your crazy girlfriends while someone records it on her phone, dressed in less than an oversized jersey and your favourite pink panties, then you should download Britney’s new album.

It is so outrageously flirty, I don’t think it even counts as tacky anymore. I love it!

There are more singles coming up, but you should probably listen to these first:

Radar
Freakshow
Hot as ice
Ooh ooh baby
Heaven on Earth
Perfect lover
Toy soldier
Get naked
Why should I be sad?

Go  dance sexy, dance crazy, dance like nobody’s watching. Dance like everything depends on it.
Dance, dance, dance. Cause sometimes everything really does depend on it.

“You’re a sweet kid, but you don’t know what it’s like to have something change you in your soul.” 

“I do, I wish I didn’t, but I do.”

“Don’t let it change you.”

On a little girl with self-inflicted severe internal damage due to a chromosomal disorder and an inability to feel pain,

“Everybody wants a life without pain, but look at this… She should be on post-its, to remind people that pain is there for a reason.”

Amazing songs are those that make absolutely no literal sense to you even if you listen to it a thousand times over. By the 1001th time, you would have butchered the lyrics so many more ways that you’d be confused as hell and you start to doubt even the spelling of 3-letter long words. 

And then one fine day, something happens and it’s either your roof or your floor. Your roof comes down on you, along with the rest of the sky, or your floor crumbles and you’re falling and falling and falling all the way down to nowhere exactly.

 Then a good friend plays that same insensible song from your Ipod and he blasts in on your car stereo while you’re driving. First you feel annoyed cause you already have to deal with your suffocatingly tight chest, now you have to deal with a crazy assed friend who yells meaningless lyrics at the top of his lungs too.

2 lines into the song and you catch his eye in the rear view mirror while you stop at the light, and you realise he has fire in his eyes. You realise he isn’t playing the song randomly. You have 1491 songs in your Ipod and this particular song was chosen for you.

 So you sing along anyway. 

2 verse and a chorus later you finally breathe again after almost 48 hours of oxygen deprivation.

An amazing song lets you cry and breathe at the same time, when you were so close to losing all hope of ever finding sanctuary.

An amazing song is one that you won’t ever understand until you experience that same level of despair, until you reach the same plane of emotional state as the one the song writer was on when he penned down the lyrics.

Do not bother googling for meaning of classics; Great writers will never tell you what their words are about. It’s not that they don’t want to explain to you their stories, they just can’t. If they could, if they were even slightly capable of being so direct about their feelings, they would have written cheap hip hop club hits instead. 

You know hip hop, they take everything as it is, at face value. When sex is just pumping and music’s just to set the beat for that pump. It makes everything ugly.

Oasis balances out the ugly.

That amazing song didn’t help me solve much, but it jumpstarted my road to recovery, when before, I didn’t think it was even possible.

“Players only love you when they’re playing.”

You wanna gamble, you gotta be prepared to lose. Cause even the luckiest don’t walk into the casino 30 times in 30 days with 30 straight wins.

After what happened on Wednesday, I am hell bent on making the remaining of this week work out in your favour. I’m gunna make sure you have fun!

I don’t know how I am going to sleep now that I’ll be alone. I wish school didn’t end so soon, but then again, we all need to move on to greater things, ya?

Needless to say, I’ll miss you heaps, Kitty dearest. xoxo.

Dear God,

If you give me a place in that Uni,
I promise to stop skipping lectures.

I will also stop downloading Grey’s Anatomy during exam periods and
start buying biodegradable eyeliner because at the rate at which I am sharpening my eye pencils and buying new ones, I am alleged to be one of the most ruthless abuser of the Earth’s natural resources.

I also promise to stop dating for superficial reasons and *rolls eyes* see the good in men beyond their looks and wealth.

I will return to my brother the money that I have taken from him by force, and feed my cats to make up for all the times I took their eating bowls away and hid it on top of the fridge just to see them look sad.

I will start sympathizing with community trash, and not call them that anymore, and I will stop making a mockery of them in front of their faces.

I will stop picking fights. I will stop sizing guys up just because I know the gentlemen won’t fight with ladies and the ruffians won’t fight with a policeman’s daughter. I will stop sizing up girls just because I know I am physically superior for the lady ladies and I am too aesthetically domineering for the minahs.

Please God, give me a spot in that Uni.

Amen.

That’s the way we like to fuck! 

This is how it feels to fuck on cocaine…

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